She’s like a stray dog – they never should have bought her that hamburger.
Who has the best red carpet style?
Can’t she just have a night out on the town like everybody else from Twilight? Preferably in a town that doesn’t put tomatoes on their hot dogs.
It was very surprising to him when she said she loved him on SNL. Almost as surprising as the time she drove around his block crying for six hours straight.
Yeah, their insurance premiums are going to go waaay up now.
Wait, it gets worse – it’s for 90210. Suck it up and ask Dad for a favor. You’re making everyone sad.
Not surprising, considering all the strength training her lungs have been through freebasing everything a person can set on fire.
Oh, was she telling that story about the time she tried to take the SAT? That one’s hilarious.
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She probably did some singing too, but it was hard to hear over the constant Titanic jokes and nervous chuckling.
He’s probably just referring to Kristen Stewart’s laughably awful performance.
